thank you again. your comments and emails are such wonderful things to look forward to. i can't tell you how encouraging it is to receive kind words, scripture, prayers, and offers of help.

this morning i was caught off guard by something that broke open my emotions. i couldn't help tears splashing down my cheeks. emerson saw and said, "mommy, you sad?" and i said, "yes honey. mommy's sad. but it's okay. i love you and i'm okay." he stood staring at me with a look of helplessness on his sweet little face. he then turned and ran to get something and came back with a winnie-the-pooh band-aid which he peeled and put on my knee. "there mommy. you need band-aid. you happy now?" oh sweet emerson. if it were only that easy. but in some strange way... a band-aid from my baby did make the pain fade and the moment seemed so precious and sacred that all i could do was feel the love and blessedness of my life.

it's hard because i don't want emerson to feel like he is responsible to deal with my sadness. i never want him to feel the weight of having to take care of my emotions. but there are just some times that my emotions can't be hidden and his sweet little heart is so kind and loving.

it must be a very insecure thing to see your mommy cry. i don't let it happen very often in front of him. but in the moments that it does happen... i'm working on teaching him that it's still safe and that he doesn't have to fix it. we've been talking a lot about how everyone is sad sometimes and it's okay to cry when we're sad and we won't stay sad forever.

emerson is such a kind little boy.

he still opens his arms wide every night and says... "comeer mommy."